Sometimes I just feel defeated. No matter how long or hard I pray, no matter how much scripture I read, no matter the truths and promises I remember God said! The last couple of days I have and it’s OK.
I believe some of you will think this is nuts. I am a Christian, a Christ-follower. How in the world can she feel defeated and say, “It’s OK! It’s because of my relationship with God that I can say, “It’s OK.” God knows me because He created me! He knows my strengths and my weaknesses. He knows what makes me feel at peace and feel defeated. He knows there is an enemy that knows these things as well.
I found out yesterday, the job I wanted was given to someone else. Then today, I went on another interview and did my very best as always, but in the car, I talked myself into feeling defeated. How many times before have you done this? One word, one phrase, something about your past, a question they ask you about a past position and you know it’s over, you blew it! If they really, really knew you, man would they love you and want to hire you on the spot.
I didn’t read my “Jesus Calling” devotion yesterday. I read both June 13 and 14th today. Man, what a difference it made. Even though I read it before my interview during my morning “Me” time, I remembered what it said. It penetrated my heart, I longed to read again and believe it. I knew it to be the truth. It was God’s word, his sweet words to me. Telling me He loves me and my faults and weaknesses. Telling me something better is waiting for me, something He created just for me! It said,“God is creating something new in me! My sinful natures, my passions and my desires have been crucified with Christ! I will keep in step with His spirit! I was chosen by God who loves me with an everlasting love! I am His!” (My paraphrasing) John 3:8, 1 Peter 2:9
My sinful natures of wanting and desiring something so bad, it takes me away from Him; My peace! When I wasn’t worried about finding another job, worried about money or anything else, I had Peace! I like that feeling. It’s hard, not worrying is hard, but knowing that I have a Savior who loves me and cares about me makes it easier. I know if I meet him and call out to him, He will hear me and give me comfort. He will give me Peace!
Tomorrow I get to be with wonderful, loving children who don’t care about what job I want or how much money I make. They’re just glad I showed up to spend time with them. And that’s just where I want to be. His Peace=My Life!
I by far don’t have all the answers, but what I do know is that God loves you and knows you! He created you with strengths and weaknesses. He made you special! He has special things for you, things for you to see and do! That’s right, just you! Trust Him, love Him and call to Him and He will bring you Peace! And it will be OK!